They’re gonna need a bigger trade-in bin.
What Happened
GameStop has reportedly made a $55.5 billion takeover offer for eBay. This move comes as GameStop, primarily a video game retailer, continues to evolve its business model.
Our Take
Alright, alright, settle down folks! You hear that? That’s the sound of collective gasp from every single person who’s ever tried to trade in a perfectly good game at GameStop and been offered three dollars and a half-eaten bag of chips. Because apparently, GameStop, bless their digital hearts, is making a $55.5 billion takeover offer for eBay! Yes, you heard that right! Fifty-five-point-five BILLION. What are they gonna pay with, gently used copies of Madden 2012? A mountain of PowerUp Rewards points? A slightly-sticky controller that “still works, mostly”? I can just imagine the board meeting: ‘Gentlemen, our quarterly profits are… well, they’re like a game of Jenga after a toddler’s had a go at it. But I have an idea! What if we just… buy eBay?’ And everyone clapped. Probably. They’re probably thinking they’ll get all those dusty old collectibles that have been listed for 10 years and finally put them in a physical store. ‘Sir, we have a rare Beanie Baby from 1997 for seven dollars, or you can trade it for this copy of Call of Duty: Black Ops II.’ The possibilities are endless! And by endless, I mean I’m pretty sure this is how the robot apocalypse starts. We’re all going to be trading our life savings for a voucher for 10% off a pre-owned PS4. Honestly, I’m just picturing the GameStop employee who has to do the ‘market adjustment’ for a vintage comic book. ‘Hmm, looks like this rare Action Comics #1 is worth… uh… three dollars and a sticker that says ‘I beat Bowser.’ Come on down, folks, the future of retail is here, and it looks suspiciously like my dusty attic after a yard sale. Just make sure you bring your receipts, because you know they’ll ask for them!
💬 “Checkmate, Bezos!” — 💬 “We accept trade-ins!”
Inspired by: GameStop makes $55.5bn takeover offer for eBay – The Guardian
