Texas: It’s what’s for dinner (and maybe dessert).
What Happened
The flesh-eating screwworm, which can infest livestock and humans, has been detected in the US for the first time in decades, with a confirmed case in Texas. This re-emergence poses a significant threat to agriculture and public health, prompting concerns about its spread.
Our Take
Alright, folks, buckle up, because if you thought mosquitoes were the worst part of a Texas summer, you were WRONG. So, so wrong. The headline practically writes itself: ‘Flesh-eating screwworm arrives in US with first case in Texas.’ My first thought? *Finally*, a headline that truly understands the phrase ‘hold my beer.’ Because everything’s bigger in Texas, including the nightmares. We’re talking about a worm that *eats flesh*. Not like, ‘Oh, it took a bite out of my steak.’ No, no, no. It’s more like, ‘My steak just took a bite out of *me*!’ Imagine being at your annual backyard BBQ, you’re just trying to enjoy a perfectly charred hot dog, maybe a slightly-too-warm potato salad, and suddenly, your hot dog starts… wiggling *back*. Not just a little bit. It’s giving you attitude. It’s looking at you like *you’re* the appetizer. And then your wife, who’s usually calm even when you set the grill on fire, lets out a shriek that could curdle milk. She’s pointing, not at your cooking, but at something far more sinister. And then you see it. Your son, bless his cotton socks, is just there, scrolling through TikTok, completely oblivious, with this tiny, insidious worm doing the Macarena out of his earbud. Because of course it’s the earbud. These things are evolving. They’re not just going for cows anymore, they’re going for the freshest brains they can find, which, let’s be honest, in a teen, are probably still marinating. So next time you’re thinking about a nice, relaxing evening under the stars in Texas, just remember: those stars might be watching you get out-eaten by a worm. And maybe, just maybe, double-check your hot dog. And your kid’s earbuds. And everything else. Especially the potato salad.
💬 “IT’S ALIVE?!” — 💬 “WHAT IS THAT?!”
Inspired by: Flesh-eating screwworm arrives in US with first case in Texas – BBC
